We Are The Champions

Open letter to the teacher with morning car duty

I get it.  You are trying to keep the line moving and get all of our kids out of the cars and into the school safely and on time. Believe me when I say I appreciate all that you do for our precious cargo. I also get that one slow kid can throw that schedule off and can be frustrating and aggravating. I even get that it’s stressful for you because there are a line of cars behind my one minivan as it takes my son one to two minutes to get himself together and get out of the car. I get it because it’s frustrating, aggravating, and stressful for me too. The thing you don’t get, that I completely understand, is that this is not the first battle of wills I’ve fought today. From the time his wonderful feet hit the floor until the time his beautiful eyes close at night there are battles. He is strong willed, he is challenging, and yes he is frustrating. I navigate the difficult waters that are my head strong and sometimes deliberately defiant son for many hours a day. You sail that water for less than two minutes a morning on the days we happen to reach you on the car line. I even get that you probably don’t like that I’m not more forceful with him in that moment but let me tell you what I don’t like: I don’t like my son’s first interaction outside of our family in the morning to be with a teacher who is outwardly frustrated with him. I honestly didn’t even hear you speak to him this morning. What kind of day do you feel that sets him up for?  And this is not the first time we have met such a beginning to the day with you. I am sure you’re probably thinking that I should be more firm in that moment and you are probably even right.  I don’t fuss at him but instead ask him to get his stuff together and get out of the car to start his day. Then I always say “I love you” and “be awesome today” because encouraging my child at that moment is more important to me than your obvious frustration. I’m not asking for special treatment for my son, hell I KNOW how difficult he is. What I AM asking for is for you to be a kind face to begin his school day. The day neither he nor I actually want to start because despite all of his willfulness and all of the many battles I would rather keep him home safe with me away from a world that includes so many unknowns. In a day with so many obstacles ahead of every child, wouldn’t it be nice to start off with kindness?

Sincerely,

The Proud Mother of a Strong Willed Son